Insanity that is all
by What Remains of Alice
Summary: Ouran DGM Crossover! thanks to some time warping Allen and Kanda are sent onto an obscure mission in modern Japan...
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Okay… I'm probably insane to write a serialized fanfic… but whatever. I have to give thanks to UchihaNightFlower, my kind editor who went through all my drabble I call chapter one and transformed it into something readable. ARIGATOU!!!!!!

Disclaimer: Ouran High School Host Club belongs to Bisco Hatori, D Grayman belongs to some other person whose name I forgot. I have no ownership over any of the characters in the story in any way. No way you can sue me.

Allen sighed. He was tired. He hurt everywhere. His eyes were sore, his legs were sore, and his BUTT was sore. Allen dropped his shoulders and sighed for the hundredth time in the last hour. It has been a week since he and Kanda were given their 'special assignment'. They arrived in this place…a god-forsaken country called 'Japan'. (There was a glint in Kanda's eyes when Komui announced their destination.) It had also been 8 hours since he and Kanda were first enrolled into Class 1-A of Ouran High School. A big-ass school, too. It has also been one hour since Kanda was chased off by rabid girls to some corner of this thousand mile school.

'Damn it, why does this school have to be so damn huge?' he thought as he walked along the endless hallways in hope of finding his partner. It wasn't only Kanda's disappearance that was making him excessively cranky, but also the fact that he was walking around with air running through his legs, making him quite…ahem…uncomfortable. See, this 'mission' was originally supposed to be for Lenalee and Kanda but on the day before the beginning of their assignment, she said she fell and sprained her ankle. Well, that's what she told Ravi to tell them. Allen had seen that suspicious grin crawling onto his face. That is one huge bastard. Anyways, there was no way that Komui would return the pre-ordered uniforms, (they cost…too much… ) and there was absolutely no way they could convince Kanda to wear a skirt. (Even though Ravi was itching to wear it…it simply didn't fit… ). So that's how (little, short, girly, cute-as-hell) Allen Walker ended up wearing a long yellow dress that was too tight across the waist.

Turning another corner, the white-headed teenager arrived at a set of huge furnished double doors. The label read "Third Music Room". It was one of the few doors Allen didn't check yet. Wanting to find Kanda as fast as possible and get the hell out of this huge-ass school, he turned the polished doorknob and slowly pushed the door open. (It was too heavy : )

(Cliché warning)  
The first thing Allen noticed was the blinding white light spilling through the door. Thousands of red rose petals spiraled out the door, dancing around Allen as he vaguely wondered who took the time to pluck all the petals off and blow them out. Then, a group of voices called in unison: "Welcome!"

Stepping into the room, Allen was greeted by a strange (okay fine, ridiculously freaky) sight. Standing in the middle of the room in a position of greeting, were some people. Well, not just some people, Allen also vaguely noticed how handsome they were. Even if they are dressed in…armors. What the fuck!?

'Huh…?' that was the only word on his mind; otherwise, Allen's brain was completely frozen. There was a tiny blonde boy perched on the shoulders of a dark haired male who was like at least 6 feet tall (190cm). To their right was a shorter brunette that Allen recognized as the person he sat next to in class that day, Fujioka Haruhi, who looked exceptionally like a girl. To his right was another tall, dark-haired male wearing a pair of glasses and writing expertly on his notebook while staring at Allen with the expression that gave him the feeling of being though the cat-scan.

In the middle stood…once stood… a prince-like blonde who, at the moment, was charging towards Allen with a rose in hand.

"Welcome, beautiful princess, to the Host Club," he said, kneeling before the already freaked-out exorcist and handing him the rose. "You're new here I presume."

"Y… yes" Allen stammered, still very surprised by the actions of the blonde. "Err… I'm actually looking for a friend of mine. Um…kind of tall, long black hair tied up, stares at you with an expression that clearly says 'fuck off'. Have you seen him?" Right after the words left his mouth, he heard Kanda's voice from the back of the room.

"Bean sprout, is that you!? Fucking help me!!! These freaks…" Kanda's voice was drowned out as it was taped shut by a devilish-looking…oh no, make that two devilish-looking, grinning-from-ear-to-ear redheads.

"Do you mean him?" they asked in unison, with a hint of amusement in their voices, and stepped to the side to reveal Kanda tied up with coils of rope and gagged with a piece of cloth.

"OHMYFUCKINGGODWHATTHEHELLDIDYOUDOTOHIM?!?!?!?!!?" Allen shrieked, the words coming out as one, running over towards Kanda, trying to free him from his bindings.

"He was running from a stampede of girls and ran in here to hide," The twin on the left said.

"Then M'lord saw him and asked if he wanted to become a host," the other continued.

"Then, he got really angry and tried to attack us with a sword." both chimed in unison. 

Then, they suddenly struck a pose, one of the twins looking up at his brother, whispering in his high voice, "Oh Hikaru, that man was so scary! I was terrified! He could have taken me and you would be so lost without me!"

The other brother held his twin close to his chest, whispering to him in a lower voice, "Don't worry, Kaoru. I will always look after you, no matter what. I will fulfill my duty as an elder brother…and one who loves you."

"Hikaru!"

"Kaoru!"

(Dramatic pause.)

"Anyways, anyways! Takashi knocked him down and then Hika-chan and Kao-chan tied him up because they were afraid he will try to attack us again when he wakes up." the tiny blonde concluded.

"Who are you?" asked the person who Allen presumed was Takashi.

"Hikaru, isn't she that new girl in our class? You know, the one who was twitchy and then charged to the senior section once class was over?" one twin asked the other. 

"Yeah, I think that's her." the other replied. 

"Hikaru… do you think…" one started.

"It just might as well be…" the other replied.

Both twins rushed towards the person they referred to as 'M'lord' and whispered into his ear.

In a split of a second, Allen found himself being tied to a chair and gagged with more cloth by the twins.

Turning in the direction of Kanda, Hikaru and Kaoru said: "Okay, let's make a deal. You join the host club, and we'll return you something that we took when you were out cold. After saying this, one of the two went to a closet and came back with mugen.

After noticing (for the first time since he was knocked out) that mugen was missing, Kanda was thrashing through his ropes, trying to break free of the bindings and strangle the twins. Naturally, by now, Allen was already past the point of helping Kanda in any way (except look innocently cute in the chair and hope that his scary captors would somehow set him free), so he just stared at the scene that was happening before him.

"Tama-chan, don't you think we should ungag him so that he can answer us now?" the tiny blonde asked the taller one. 'Tama-chan' smiled. "Hikaru, Kaoru, I think it is time for us to show our captive some hospitality and…" Before he could finish his sentence, the twins had already untied the rope that was tightly wound around Kanda's mouth.  
Before the cloth could even fall to the floor, Kanda was already screaming insults at the twins. "WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU TWO INCESTIOUS FREAKS? WHY THE HELL DO YOU WANT ME TO BECOME A HOST? WHAT THE FUCK IS A FUCKING HOST? WHAT DO YOU WANT WITH BEAN SPROUT AND WHY THE FUCKING HELL DID YOU FUCKING TIE HIM UP???OH WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON MUGEN AGAIN…"

"Wait a minute, you meant her, right?" one of the two red 'imps' asked. "I FUCKING MEAN HIM WHEN I FUCKING SAY HIM!!" Kanda screamed back.

Everyone in the room (except for Kanda) stared at Allen. Then, the twins walked up towards him and started staring at him and probing random places like his ribs with their fingers. "Yep, he's a boy all right."

"Okay… this is really… awkward." Haruhi said. Don't you think we should just let them go? You know that they can tell on us for this you know?" Then, the shady guy with glasses that was silent the whole time talked. "Even if they did tell on us for this, we can say that we tied him up because he was attempting physical assault upon us, and besides, weapons are not even permitted within campus. If he doesn't join the host club, we can still report him for performing acts of violence and bringing a restricted artifact to school. In other words, it's an all-win deal for us"

Allen twitched. Never before could he have imagined such a cunning and evil person to exist. Now he witnessed that person force Kanda to accept the fate of becoming a host or lose mugen… truly disturbing.

"Soo… what's your choice? Host or not Host?" the twins asked. "Host" Kanda grumbled, not exactly used to being defeated. Especially not by a pair of incestuous twins younger than him that somehow managed to tie him up.

"Good. Oh, and by the way…" both said. "I'm Hikaru" the one on the left finished. "and I'm Kaoru" the other one added. "But sometimes it's the other way around!" both chimed.

"I'm Haaaaannniii!!!! And you're new nickname is Kan-chan 3" Han exclaimed. Then, he pointed at the tall guy who was giving him a piggyback ride. "And that's Takashi!"

"But everyone calls him Mori" Haruhi whispered to Kanda. "And the blonde guy over there's Tamaki, the president of the host club." "The scary person beside him with glasses is Kyouya. Whatever you don, don't make him mad." After Haruhi finished introducing everyone, Hikaru and Kaoru undid Kanda's ropes and helped him up. "Aaaaannnddddd…. WELCOME, NEW HOST, TO OURAN HIGH SCHOOL HOST CLUB!!!!!!!!" all the club members (except for Mori cuz he never talks anyways) hollered.  
"… aren't you going to untie Bean Sprout then?" Kanda asked.  
"We need to hold him permanent hostage so that you won't try to escape." Kyouya replied. Allen could tell that Haruhi's warning about him was something that should be heeded.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N Okay… this took three or four days to write. I tried to work on it in math class. Got caught by the teacher… and now everyone knows what D Grayman is. Oh well.

Disclaimer: Ouran High School Host Club belongs to Bisco Hatori. D Grayman belongs to someone else. If I owned either of them, both would be put with the yaoi manga in the bookstores… and I'm making no profit from this whatsoever.

Warning: I think I may have made Renge a bit OOC in a lot of points. This fanfic was not edited… I apologize. And there is a tiny hint of shonen-ai, but don't worry. There is no way I am turning this into a romance… but it's assured that multiple pairings will show up in the series later!

"Hmm…we might have an issue if he joins though..." Tamaki said, staring intently at a wary Kanda. "Since Mori-sempai is already the wild type, what can we classify you as?"

Kanda closed him eyes and sighed, determined to stay calm. 'They even have types?' he thought.

---------------------

Next day, after school, the minute after class ended, the twins had again abducted Allen and rushed towards the Third Music Room to ensure that Kanda would arrive. Sure enough, ten minutes after the bell rang, the young swordsman showed up, face hidden in a mask of 'fuck-off'…as usual.

They had, for the last half an hour, been discussing what host type Kanda should be classified as. Tamaki wanted him to be another wild type like Mori-sempai, but Hani-sempai objected strongly because he didn't want his Takashi being replaced like what nearly happened to him. As you know, Tamaki couldn't defy Hani-sempai's order without risking the possibilities of an explosion similar to what happened in a certain army camp certain years ago.

"He could be the frightening type." Kaoru said casually, looking up from the catalog he and his brother were reading.

"Yeah, he really did scare the shit out of us with that sword of his. And plus, that look on his face…" Hikaru replied, receiving a death glare from Kanda.

"But, Hikaru… he scared me so much yesterday." Kaoru whimpered, eyes welling up in (fake) tears.

"Don't worry Kaoru. I'll protect you from the horrible monster, even if it costs me my life." Hikaru replied in a soothing tone, placing a hand on his trembling brother's chin and bringing him up for a kiss.

"You do realize that we are supposed to be on duty right now? So can you people please get this over with and stop messing up today's schedule?" Kyouya growled coldly from the desk he was working on.

Immediately, everyone shut up and the twins aborted the kiss scene, much to the dismay of the fangirls that somehow got into the room before they unlocked the doors for public access.

"I think we should try to let him be a warrior type or something that requires him to have a sword," Haruhi said, "it would save remodeling him into another personality."

"I knew my daughter would think of such a brilliant idea!" Tamaki exclaimed, pouncing onto the sofa Haruhi was on and tried to hug her as said 'daughter' dropped a 2159 page World History textbook on his head.

"I don't think it would work though. Warrior is a bit too general." Kaoru replied in a bored tone, as he played with a lock of his brother's hair. "It would be too ambiguous of a personality to create." The second his sentence was finished, the ground began to shake violently.

"HOLY SHIT IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!!!" Allen screamed from the chair which he was tied and gagged to since the start of their conversation, though it sounded more like "OOOWEEE SHIFFFF IPHH UUUU UFFFF CAEEEE!!!"

"Don't worry, it's just Renge." Tamaki said coolly, composing perfect posture and serenity as an oversized platform emerged from the ground.

(I can't really type out how Renge laughs without making her either sound retarded or constipated, so I won't try) "Naïve you are Kaoru! Warriors are anything but general!"

With a great leap, she landed on the floor and charged towards Kanda with an alarming speed. "A warrior," she continued with great passion, "is a servant to society. Noble, strong, determined, and eternally loyal to all that he loves. He is every girl's dream, her desire, her savior!" With a dramatic sigh, she mock-fainted onto the floor.

Kanda stared at the girl lying on the floor, debating on whether she was an overly exaggerated fangirl or just plain kooky. Before he could reach a decision, however, Renge pounced onto him and stared at him with an intently.

"He," she finally said in conclusion of what she studied, "will need a lot of training. Starting with that expression of his and possibly a new hairstyle. Oh, and by the way, who's the girl?"

"That's Ellen-chan. She's Kanda's girlfriend." Tamaki said airily, as though Kanda's 'girlfriend' wasn't tied and gagged to a chair and trying his best to deny his identity as Kanda's lover.

"Hmm… interesting. At first I thought she was a boy cross-dressing as a girl. This reminds me of…" Before her sentence was finished, the twins had already pounced on her and muffled her cries of protest with their hands.

"They don't know yet." Hikaru hissed into Renge's ear. They probably didn't mean for Kanda to hear that, but he heard it anyways and he was now raising a delicate eyebrow, looking at the lump on the floor.

"Ahem, now that his position is confirmed, when do you think training should start, Renge-san?" Tamaki asked, trying to steer the subject away from the awkward moment.

"Well, we could start today, but it would seem too difficult because there are no experiment girls we could use except for Ellen, but since she's his girlfriend, she doesn't count." Renge continued. "Then there's the issue that I know far too less about his personality to understand what is needed to be altered for proper modeling. I guess we'll have to stick with using Ellen as the experiment girl if we start today…"

"Allen's not my girlfriend." Kanda said. Why the hell was everyone getting the impression that he and Bean Sprout was a thing? "He's just a close friend of mine."

"You mean she, right?" Renge asked. "Because you said that she was a girl and she does look like a girl so I think she is a girl but she might not be because there are known cases when people dress as the opposite gender to achieve certain goals, but then again, isn't this a bit too moe for reality…?" This went on for quite a while, nearly boring Kanda half to death. Who knew she could be such a chatterbox?

Kanda cast a glance at where Allen was sitting. Still gagged and tied up, he surveyed his silver-haired coworker. His eyes were half-closed with exhaustion, his expression a serene one… or half-insane, depends on how you look at it. The uniform fitted him fairly well, bringing out many of his feminine attributes, making him (for a moment) quite pretty.

'Holy shit!' Kanda thought, 'I was just checking out Bean Sprout. This is so wrong. Bad Kanda, bad!' he mentally chastised himself.

"HELLO??? WERE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME???" Renge suddenly yelled.

"Huh? What were you saying?"

"Renge-san is going to start the 'transformation' tomorrow after class." Haruhi whispered. "Good luck. I hope you'll be better off than Nekozawa-sempai when she did this to him." She added, grimacing at the thought of the memory.

Kanda gulped. This was not going to be good.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: FINALLY!!!!!! As usual, thank you UchihaNightFlower for editing my fic and saving it from total destruction. BOW TO THE POWER OF My MIGHT EDITOR! Or you'll be more dead than I was when I forgot to send my latest work to her two times in a row.

Disclaimer: Ouran High School Host Club belongs to Bisco Hatori. D Grayman belongs to someone else. I made no money from writing this.

"FOR THE LAST TIME FRIGGIN' NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Renge shrieked. "You don't use such crude language talking to a girl!!! You have to be gentlemanly, sincere, but not too sensitive, you have to be strong, yet caring at the same time!!!"

Renge was, again, making a futile attempt to change Kanda's style of speech… which was not going at all well. (She only managed to convince him to stop calling Allen Bean Sprout after two afternoons of screaming at him). They were doing simulation conversations with Allen as the guest. So far, Renge had already ruled out 27 conversation topics, 14 tones of voice, and at least 5000 words out of Kanda's vocabulary.

"Then what the hell AM I supposed to talk about with her!?" Kanda yelled after Renge added samurai epics onto the list of restricted conversations.

"There's no other topic to talk about! The only other things I can talk about is killing. DO YOU WANT ME TO TELL THEM THE BEST METHOD TO SLICE SOMEONE IN HALF WITH A SWORD!?!?!?!?!?!!!"

Then Renge thwacked Kanda in the head with a book. "Don't use that tone with me!" she hissed.

"Why you little…" Before Kanda could finish the sentence, he and Renge were already in a cat fight, each trying their best to rip out the others' hair. Allen sighed. It would take a while.

"Umm… Hikaru, Kaoru, can you guys untie me? I need to go to the bathroom." Allen said. Yes, surprisingly, he was still tied to a chair every session. Nearly instantaneously, he was freed of his bindings by the twins.

"Ah- chan!" Hani suddenly exclaimed. "Takashi and I are going with you if you don't mind!" Then he made the cutest smile Allen had ever seen and he simply couldn't refuse the miniscule senior's expression.

"Erm… okay. I need someone to show me where the bathroom is anyways." Allen replied. After that was settled, the three of them rushed out of the room before Kanda and Renge could get near the Meissen tea set that was placed on the table.

After closing the door, Allen sighed with relief. The actual reason why he said he wanted to go to the bathroom was that he was getting really queasy staying in the same room with two extremely violent people in argument.

"You might want to get used to this." Hani said as they walked down the hallways. "They could EVEN bigger than right now in the future!" he smiled, hugging his stuffed bunny. "By the way, this is Usa-chan!" He thrusted the pink ball of fabric and cotton towards Allen.

Allen smiled. It was sort of unbelievable that there could be such a childishly sweet senior. Turning to the other side, he looked at the other sempai walking next to him.

"Uh… Mori-sempai… are you usually this quiet?" he asked Mori as politely as possible, trying to start a conversation. The answer he received was a short nod, and that was all. "Not much of the talking type huh?" he thought to himself.

"Takashi's always like this. He talks to nobody. Sometimes he barely even talks to me." Hani said. "He may seem really cold towards people, but he's actually super nice!" And then he pounced onto Mori and grabbed his neck. "BECAUSE TAKASHI IS MY FAVORITE PERSON IN THE WORLD!!!!!! 3"

"Ah-chan, what's your relationship with Kan-chan ayways?" Hani asked, staring at Allen from Mori's back.

"Um… well… it's complicated." Allen replied. "Back in England, he was really cold towards everyone. He didn't really have any friends, so I felt kinda sorry for him, so I tried to understand him more and stuff, but he kept on pushing me away." Allen smiled ruefully as he remembered the many failing attempts he made with starting a conversation with Kanda during mealtimes back in the Black Order and on other missions.

At this point, they were nearing a crowd of girls that were going in the opposite direction. Most of them had food from the cafeteria. One was eating a banana and accidentally dropped the peel onto the floor. Obviously, Allen didn't notice the vaudeville slipping object that was lying on the floor in front of him, so what happened when he took another step forwards was fairly predictable. He slipped.

"Shit!" Allen hissed as he crashed to the floor, crushing his right leg beneath the weight of his body. Everyone turned around when they heard the loud crash. One of the girls stared guiltily at the banana she was eating.

"Ah-chan! Are you okay??" Hani exclaimed as he rushed forwards to help Allen up. With the help of the tiny blonde, Allen managed to stay upright on his own for two seconds, and then came crashing to the floor again.

"God, I think I sprained something." He muttered as he felt a jolt of pain charge through the lower part of his right leg. Hani immediately bent down and unbuckled the strap of the Mary Jane on Allen's right foot. After the white stocking was pulled down, a large purplish swell was exposed on Allen's ankle.

Allen winced in pain as he tried to move his ankle. It seemed fairly evident that it would be impossible for him to walk.

"TAKASHIII!!!!!!! What are we going to DOOOOO??????" Hani wailed, eyes welling up with tears. Takashi nodded. Then, in one fluid motion, he picked up Allen and was holding the shorter boy in his arms- maiden style (which, by the way, caused more than half the girls to faint)

"We should go back now." Mori said quietly. "Mitzukini, let's go." After that Mori started walking towards the direction of the Third Music Room, with Hani bouncing along behind him.

Allen sighed. It seemed as though he was always getting into situations when others had to save him. It was really embarrassing for him to be carried around by another male. Actually, he thought to himself, it felt kinda nice. He could feel Mori's heartbeat and breathing. As they moved, he was also rocked around as though he were in a cradle. Soon he fell asleep…

"BEAN SPROUT!!!! WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO YOU!!!!" Allen was awakened by Kanda screaming at him. He found himself on a sofa in the Third Music Room, everyone sort of crowding around him.

"I cannot believe you could be so stupid as to trip on a banana peel. A FUCKING BANANA PEEL!!! PEOPLE ONLY TRIP ON THOSE IN FUCKING COMEDY SHOWS!!!!!" Saying this, Kanda untied his hair and took the ribbon and wrapped it around Allen's wounded ankle.

"God, why do you have to be so fucking troublesome all the time…" the older teen muttered as he looped the long ribbon around the ankle and heel.

Allen looked around to see what everyone else was doing. Haruhi and the twins were listening to Hani explain what happened, Tamaki had run outside screaming for the school doctor, Kyouya was typing on his laptop as though nothing had happened at all, Renge was trying to convince to stop calling Allen a fucking idiot when he was bandaging his foot, and Mori was… where was Mori?

"Uhh… have you guys seen Mori-sempai anywhere?" Allen asked shyly.

"He said that he was going to get some ice for your foot." Haruhi replied.

"Oh… okay." Allen said, wondering why the senior was being so nice to him.

"Oh, and he wanted us to tell you that you should rest right now and not move your foot." Allen smiled. Hani was right. Mori was really a nice guy… or is the niceness due to something else…


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Shorter chappie this time. I'm in da school library right now at fucking 4:50 pm. This fic took longer than I expected cuz I had to poll what dress Allen should wear. I'm going to post a link to the design later. Okay, all editing credit still goes to UchihaNightFlower. Thx again.

Disclaimer: Ouran High School Host Club belongs to Bisco Hatori, DGM belongs to someone else, but the dress belongs to me!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!!!!!! 'kay toodlez!

A few weeks had passed since Allen sprained his ankle, and thanks to modern medication and all the Kanda-yelling that Allen got every time he tried to walk, his foot healed. It was nearing the school's annual formal Halloween party, and the Host Club was buzzing with ideas for activities, when actually, the were just arguing over the outfits that Kanda should wear to make his debut since everything else was already finished one month ago.

"For the last time, we can't have him wear leather!" Tamaki exclaimed as the twins produced yet another leather jacket donned with chains from a gigantic chest filled with more than enough of their own Gothic-Lolita designs.

"But why not???" both whined in unison. "He looks hot in leather and almost every and anything that's gothic needs leather!"

"Because if he wears leather, then Allen will have to wear leather as well and the only leather girl clothing you have is that strapless mini-dress." Tamaki replied, "And… and… HARUHI SHOULD BE WEARING THAT!!!"

"HELL NO! I AM NOT WEARING THAT DRESS!!!" Haruhi yelled from the other side of the room, where she refused to take part in the clothing war.

"But why not???" Tamaki whined as he charged towards her, thrusting the dress onto her lap. "YOU MUST WEAR IT!!! DADDY TELLS YOU TO DO SO, YOU MUST OBEY!!!"

"I still don't get why we have to set our theme as vampires this year." Hani said as he shoved a piece of strawberry cake in his mouth. "I mean, we didn't have a costume theme last year, so why should we have one this year?"

"Do you guys think this will work for Kanda?" Allen asked shyly as he held up a black vest with a red cross embroidered on it. (Oh my, you can see Allen's kinda enjoying himself! –UNF). From the centre of the cross, a chain was extended to the breast pocket of the vest. Kanda could just wear a red dress shirt under it.

"It might," the twins said, "The only things left to do would be to figure out make up and accessories!"

"I don't think we need the makeup though, his face is pale enough."

"Good point there, but accessories will be tough, this shirt can't fit with a sword and bloodstains would just ruin the effect of the cross…"

"Oh, Allen, if he's going to wear that set, then you should try this on." Hikaru said and threw what seemed to be a ball of black and red lace at him. Upon straightening out the large bundle, Allen held a black and red gothic Lolita dress.

"The changing room is over there" Kaoru said as he pointed towards a door that seemed to have pop out of nowhere. Clutching the dress, Allen walked in, uncomfortable. A few minutes later, he came back out.

Kanda gasped. Even though the skirt went down to Allen's knees, the top was still strapless, exposing the young exorcist's pale shoulders. The crucifix that dangled from his choker rested perfectly in the little cave between the collarbones.

Allen blushed when he realized that Kanda was staring at him.

'The blush made him seem so irresistibly damn cute.' Kanda thought (Note: if this fic was rated M, the smut would be starting here. (Yeah wtv, son)). 'Wait! I'm doing it again!' Kanda groaned inwardly. It had been the second time he had caught himself having weird thoughts about Allen.

"Well, how do I look?" Allen asked, looking down at his feet.

"Well…umm…" Kanda mumbled, trying to make a response that would not sound sappy, and blushed when no words came out.

"The Mary Jane will have to go." Kaoru cut in. He ran over to the chest and retrieved a pair of thigh-length black leather lace-up boots. "Here, try these."

Allen stared at the boots with a weird look on his face, took off his shoes and placed them neatly beside the chair. Then, he undid the laces on the boots and slid them on. In doing so, he raised his knee up so that he could slide the boots on, giving Kanda a brief view of his inner thigh.

'He really does look… STOP THINKIN ABOUT HIM!' Kanda mentally slapped himself, 'WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM? STOP THINKING ABOUT HIM! STOP THINKING ABOUT BEAN SPROUT! STOP THINKING ABOUT BEAN SPROUT! Then, a memory of Allen wearing nothing but a towel around his waist walking into a bathroom popped into his head… 'AAAHHH! FUCK!'

"Oi Kanda! You should wear this." Hikaru said, breaking Kanda's chain of mental screaming. He gave him the black vest Allen had picked out and a red dress shirt that was ridiculously ruffled at the collar and the cuffs, and pushed him insides a changing room.

Kanda took off his blazer and hung it on one of the hangers in the tiny room. He then swapped his regular white shirt for the ruffled red one and donned the black vest. He left the changing room and stepped back out. He wanted to get this over with as soon as possible because the ruffles at the collar were really itchy and his ponytail was kind of becoming loose.

"There. Can I take this off now?" he muttered. Everyone turned around and stared, even Haruhi. Silence.

"It's perfect." Hikaru finally declared. "The shirt and vest is a stroke of genius Allen!" Everyone agreed. "Okay, we've kept all of you guys long enough today. Time to go home now!"

After changing back into their uniforms, Kanda and Allen said their goodbyes and left the classroom. The walk towards the door was awkwardly silent.

"Kanda… you looked really… um… nice in the shirt." Allen suddenly said, blushing like a lovesick schoolgirl.

Kanda could feel the blood rushing to his face. It was the first time anyone complimented him on how he looked and it was his adorable (AAAHHHH STOP THINKING ABOUT ALLEN THAT WAY!) Bean Sprout who said it.

"Don't remind me." He muttered, speeding up his pace.

"Well, you do!" Allen said pouting. "Besides, it's not embarrassing for me to say this because we ARE a 'couple', you know?" Saying this, Allen turned the shade of a piece of ootoro (Haruhi turns around and stares at author) and giggled. "That sounded weird, didn't it?"

"Oh, shut up." Kanda muttered and rolled his eyes.

Editor's note:

Yes, I'm UchihaNightFlower, Alice's editor. Haha know me by UNF, or Usagi-Chan because I'm gonna be popping up in here a lot! I basically save my son from allt he grammar crisis he is in. But he's really talented. Really. Oh well! Haha. I'm lame.


End file.
